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Hello, and welcome to Random Funny Quotes. We created this site in order for people to share short funny quotes and sayings with others. We are sure you have learned some funny quotes or sayings throughout life from family, friends and co-workers. If you are a random, funny person, then this place is a great venue for you to express yourself. Don't be shy, it's totally anonymous and you might make someone's day by putting a smile on their face. If you would like to share a funny quote or saying with others, simply SUBMIT one to our site. Enjoy the funny quotes and happy reading!

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If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with them. --- Anonymous


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Dear Hard to Open Cake Containers,
It was not my intention to get a workout before eating the contents inside.
--- Anonymous


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I love it when you walk thorough a spider web, you all of a sudden learn Kung Fu.


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On the show Storage Wars, do you think some of the people watching are like "HEY THAT'S MY STUFF MAN." --- Sweet_1_88


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Marriage is a three ring circus
... engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering ...
--- cmos


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*Press a toy in the store* *won't stop making noise* walk away, walk away. --- bailey_kay12


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I wonder if in 5 to 10 years, will anyone will have enough personality to actually hold a conversation with someone without texting or e-mailing? --- dockstar


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When I die, I'm gonna have one of my friends dress up like the grim reaper and stand in the back. --- Contagion


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A teenager is always too tired to hold a dishcloth, but never too tired to hold a smartphone. --- Ansyori


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